Sometimes Making Music Ain’t Easy

There’s so much that’s beautiful about making music. But sometimes it ain’t easy.

Beauty and the Beast

There are mountains of reasons to play musical sounds. They start with the joy of connecting to other music makers. And then continue through those cascades to a sense of personal satisfaction (or at least catharsis).

For me, another big part of why I make music is that I am compelled to do it. Something in me keeps calling to a particular part of my brain and soul that cannot stop. When I hear that call, the only thing that will keep me from going nutty is to play an instrument, write songs, and sing.

What’s Driving?

But not all of creating music is pushed along by that drive. I play music live and I also create music in a recording studio. Both of these call on me to bring out what I’ve learned over the years.

But more than this, these call on me to be vulnerable. Making music is a potentially scary endeavor. I’ve written about this before, but this time, it’s pushed me too far again.

I have now attempted to write a commissioned song 5 times. And I can’t get it to how I want it to sound. The real problem is that I’m afraid that the client won’t like the song. Or worse-yet (says my brain), that they won’t like me.

The Essence of Making Music

Obviously, I’m grown up enough and smart enough to know that I don’t control how other people think. Plus, my music and myself are not identical. As much as I feel close to the music I make, it is not all of me.

It’s time to drop back into the joy of creating. Making music comes from my soul (but is not my soul itself).

Let’s try that again: Sometimes Making Music Ain’t Easy.