My sixth singer-songwriter release is “Love Is On Repeat”. After several delays, I’m really happy to be offering this song for your listening enjoyment. In the same way, I’m overjoyed to share this story about my current life. Unlike the previous five songs, this one was written this year. If you can’t wait, the video (guitar “live” version) is at the bottom of this post and here’s a song player of the studio/electric piano version.
It’s amazing to me how much change can be affected in one person’s life. No! What I really mean is it’s amazing to me how much change has happened in my own life. I can’t begin to tell you all the details in a single blog post. Still, I will definitely do my best to give you a sample of where my life is today.
I’ve already told the basic story of my heart arrhythmia on this blog. (You can read about that here.) In summary, I have an extra beat in my pulse. I could have taken that as (pardon the pun) down-heartening news – and frankly some days it is. As it turns out, it’s also a great symbol for how much my living comes from my heart these days.
Like many men in our culture, I used to live almost entirely from a shielded place. What I mean is that I armored myself against friend and foe alike. As you can imagine, that way of living does not lead to much friendship or human connection. On the outside, I appeared to be very giving and sensitive person. In fact, that was not just an appearance. It was true. But it also was a smokescreen for the ways that I kept many internal truths to myself.
Integrity and Vulnerability
In order to share that internal world with anyone else, I had to learn two things: integrity and vulnerability. Integrity for me means aligning what I say with what I do. After years of practicing this, I can tell you that it is more challenging than the words make it sound. It’s a challenge worth facing because the payoff is beyond imagination.
Vulnerability is the willingness and practice of opening my heart up to those I trust and sometimes even beyond the circles. As dictionaries and politicians will remind us, vulnerability is therefore a state of being open to injury, or appearing as if you are.
In my experience, both integrity and vulnerability require me to live in an open-hearted way. The benefits of this I’ve primarily noticed in my deeper friendships and in my marriage. I would not trade any of these for any other treasure. Relationships based in this kind of living are unmatched in anything I’ve experienced. Again I’ll say that I have not perfected this kind of living. I am still on the path and ask for patience and compassion as I continue to do my best.
Another wonderful thing that comes out of my integrity and vulnerability is a song like “Love Is On Repeat”. I don’t think you’ll have any trouble understanding what I mean when you listen to or read the lyrics to this song. There’s a live version that includes a lyric video as well as a studio version. I hope you enjoy listening! If you’ve read this far I can honestly say: thank you so much for your support.