Heartburn – a poem by Stan Stewart

I have heartburn and what I mean by that
is that my heart is breaking
thinking of the relationships
I have betrayed over the years
(And continue to betray)
with whatever level of intention
or unintentionality
I have brought to them

I have heartburn
and what I mean by that
is that my heart is broken
with the regret and shame
For the unborn children
Whose lives I could have been part of
but never was
And never will be

I have heartburn
And what I mean by that
Is that my heart is on fire
Burning up to share the news
That when people come together
Purposely seeking community
With mutual giving
We can truly create something beautiful
I’ve seen this beauty in eye contact
So deep that neither partner could
Pull their eyes away from that gaze

(Noticing the love that builds in
Soft and frenzied tones,
I acknowledge my own loyalty,
Fidelity, tenacity:
The creative seed that is me –
Birthing and breeding the new
In each moment,
Leaping and meandering into
Depths of belonging and
Heights of making others welcome.
As I witness this
Becoming
I am inspired to go with
A deep sense of inner authority.)

I have heartburn
And what I mean by that
is that my heart is ablaze with love
For myself
And in beholding this self-love
I am astounded with the vivid
Knowledge that by showing
This love towards me I will
Illumine my world in a way that
Will let you more fully see
How much I love you

~ by Stan Stewart
Loosely based on an improvised poem performance at InterPlay Men’s Retreat, 2013. Inspired by and dedicated to the 25 men who created beauty that weekend.
Copyright © 2013 by muz4now, Inc.
All Rights Reserved.