#Poem – spare

Words have different meanings
To different people
And in different lands.

When I woke up this morning
(Later than usual),
I was not ready to start.
I was more ready to end
Or at least return to my slumber.

You can’t think for a second that
I was being purely lazy.
That was not it at all.
I was prepared to face
This or that,
But I could not get
Started to show that I was prepared.

You were there,
Summarizing the day before
And setting before us the day
Of now.

I had nothing to spare.
You were enlivened.
In the past, I had dreamt
That I could gather up
Your enlivenment for
Myself.
Now, I know that doesn’t work.

In Scotland, “spare” meant crazy.

I was not crazy enough to buy
Into my old dream.
It was time for a new dream.
A waking dream that would
Drive me into a new beginning.

The calm of your voice.
The settling in my body
And the wisdom that resides there
Was enough to get me started.

How did I get here?
It was not fully by my own doing.
Here I am, seeking to be the one “being”
And not always getting there on my own.
I long for the security and simplicity
Of what we knew previously.

And I know that what we will get
Will be something completely new:

Both out of necessity and by design.

~ by Stan Stewart

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